Three Stages Of Life

Three stupid stages of life:

TEENAGE:
Have time and energy, but no money

WORKING AGE:
Have money and energy, but no time

OLD AGE:
Have time and money, but no energy

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The "Will be ready in 5 minutes" of a woman
.
.
.
ans
.
.
.
The "Will call you in 5 minutes" of a man
.
.
.
Are the same thing!

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Boy sent the most expensive bird that could speak 40 languages as b'day gift to his girlfriend. Next day he asked about the gift.
BF: how is the bird?
GF: Very tasty...