Thursday, September 30, 2010

Kaun Kehta Hai Apse

kaun kehta hai ki apse hamari judaai hogi
ye afwah zarur kisi dushman ne udaayi hogi
shaan se rahenge hum apke dil mein
itne dino mein humne kuch to jagah banayi hogi

Sweet & Romantic Love Letter

A Boy Writes:

To Girl

Hi Dear Girl,
I love you. My dream I see you. Everywhere you. You no, I live no. I come red shirt tomorrow. You love I, you come red frock. I wait down mango tree. You no come, I jump tree. Sure come.

Yours lovely,
Std UKG "C"

Girl Replies:

Your letter mummy see. Papa beat me bahut saara. Mummy angry, lock me room. I no come. You no jump. I love you.

Yours lovingly,

What Is Love?

What's Love?
It's LOVE when a little baby girl puts all her energy to give her Daddy a head massage to relief his headache.
It's LOVE when a wife makes tea for her husband and take a sip before him to see if the tea is OK.
It's LOVE when a mother gives her son the best piece of cake and he pass it to his younger sister.
It's LOVE when a friend holds your hand tightly on a slippery road after rain for your protection.
LOVE is actually a name of CARE
--- TAKE CARE ---

What Is Newton's Law?

A man married to a short girl. People asked him why he married such a short girl. He replied, "Musibat jitni chhoti ho utna he achcha hai".


Sir: what is Newton's Law?
Student: Sir, I just remember the last part
Sir: ok, recite that
Student: "..... and this is called Newton's Law"


A boy told his friend: a girl is smiling and looking at me
Friend: first confirm if she is smiling and looking at you or if she is looking and smiling at you

Monday, September 27, 2010

I Will Never Jump A Red Light

Interesting Story -
3 friends lived in the same flat on 110th floor. One day the lift wasn't working so they had to climb the stairs. To pass time they decided that 1st person should tell a War Story, 2nd a Funny Story and 3rd a Sad Story. So, 1st person told a story and they climbed up to 50th floor. 2nd one said a funny story and they climbed up to 109th floor. Now it was the 3rd friends chance he said, "I've left the house key in the car".


"Change cannot be given to you every time, you only must bring the change." Great lines said by - Mr.Raju, Bus Conductor


A lady broke a signal and was presented in front of the judge.
Lady: Your honor please let me go. I am a school teacher I am getting late for my class.
Judge: Aha! so you are a teacher! I have waited for this moment all my life.
Now write down-
"I will never jump a red light" 5000 times


World's thinnest book is published titled "What Does Women Wants". It has only 1 page with only 1 word "EVERYTHING"

I Want Happiness

A man told God: I Want Happiness
God said: 1st remove 'I' that's EGO
then remove 'Want' that's DESIRE
and see
now you are left with only HAPPINESS

Saturday, September 25, 2010

Two Different Concepts

Japanese Proverb -
If one can do, you too can do. If none can do, you must do.

Indian Concept -
If one can do, let him do. If no one can do, how can I do?

Pee Ke Raat Ko

pee ke raat ko hum usko bhulane lage
sharab mein apne gham ko milane lage
zalim sharab peete he apna asar dikhane lagi
ab to uske nashe mein uski aur bhi yaad aane lagi

I Hate Kids

Student: Ma'am I really like you and I will marry you
Teacher (angrily): I hate kids
Student: Ma'am I'll try not to have kids

I Wish You Were A Book

A man speaks 25,000 words daily and a woman speaks 30,000. But the problem starts when husband comes home after consuming his 25,000 and wife starts her 30,000.


Wife: I am a book of your life
Husband: I wish you were a calender at least I could have changed you every year.

Friday, September 24, 2010

Pain & Rain Have A

Pain and Rain have a strong bonding. When you are in deep pain you cry like a heavy rain and when you see rain you MISS your loved ones and feel the same pain.

Usse Kaun Layega Wapas?

Agar Jackie Chan ki mother-in-law ko kidnap kar liya to usse kaun wapas layega?



Vicks Vaporub! kyunki VICKS lautaye chain ki saas

People Say We Are

People say we are crazy when we smile with no reason when we are alone. They never know that it's the real smile with sweetest reason with some one in thoughts.

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Before & After Marriage

Before Marriage: roses are red, sky is blue, you are beautiful, I LOVE YOU
After Marriage: roses are dead, I have flu, don't eat me head, PARRE HATT TU!!!

English Translation

The most romantic lines -
Main kho gaya hun tumhare pyaar mein tum bhi kho jaao...

Translation In English -
I am lost in your love, you also GET LOST...

Friendship Msgs

hawa se bujh jaye wo roshani hamari nahi
tufano se doob jaye wo kashti hamari nahi
aur jo duriyon se mit jaye wo DOSTI hamari nahi


In life we have many relations but the best one is friendship...
Mom says: tell me beta what's your problem, I am like your friend na!
Dad says: don't feel scared, take me as your friend beta!
Bro/Sis says: come on buddy don't hide anything from me, I am like your friend yaar!
Lover says: come on sweetheart, treat me as your friend
Only Friend says: chal ja na... dimag kharab mat kar


Love Is: when we drink the coconut water from 1 coconut by putting 2 straws
Friendship Is: when we drink coconut water from 1 coconut using 1 straw and say, "Abbey bhikhari, pura mat peena."

It Will Blast

Wife: don't put the mobile on charging at night, it will blast!
Husband: just shut up! and sleep, I have already taken out the battery

Monday, September 20, 2010

Meaning Of Bravery

When you come home late night from a club totally drunk and your Dad open the doors with a hockey stick in his hand and you cheer

"Yo Dad! Chak De India"!

Pyaar Kabhi Na Karna

pyaar kabhi na karna pardesi se
rote rote naina thak jayenge
pyaar karna hamesha padosi se
roz balcony se darshan to ho jayenge

P.J Shayari

Arz Kiya Hai -
gham hai aur tanhai hai
wah wah!!!
gham hai aur tanhai hai
wah wah!!!
zalimo tum bhi to msg karo
meri kya do number ki kamai hai

Money Or Brains

Madam: what will you choose between money and brains
Student: money
Madam: I would have rather picked brains
Student: people choose only what they do not have

I Will Marry Only You

Girl: my mother really likes you
Boy (bashfully): whatever happens I will marry only you plz ask aunty to forget me

Smile And Silence

Successful people always have two things on their lips, "Smile and Silence". Smile on lips solve the problem. Silence on lips avoid the problem.

Height Of Insult

People were waiting for bus at the bus stop in the scorching heat of sun. A beggar came and collecting money from people standing there sat in a rickshaw and left.

Sunday, September 19, 2010

What Are You Looking For?

A husband was going through his marriage certificate very keenly.
Wife: what are you looking for from so long?
Husband: I am looking for the expiry date

Mummy Ko Bolo Complan Pilaye

A girl was attempting suicide by hanging. A sardar saw this through window. Guess what he said? Latakne se height nahi badegi Mummy ko bolo complan pilaye!!!

Mobile Marriage Service

Mobile Marriage Service -
Press 1 for marriage proposals
Press 2 for engagement
Press 3 for marriage
Ist Person: what should be pressed for second marriage?
IInd Person: first wife's neck

Dharti Pe Ishwar Ki

dharti pe Ishwar ki talash hai
malik tera banda kitna nirash hai
kyun khojta hai insaan Ishwar ko
jabki tere dusre roop mein MAA uske itne paas hai

You Were Born Original

You were born original don't die as a copy. Don't care if some one does not like you, you were not put on earth to please anyone. Life is to express yourself not to impress anyone.

I Am Always Around You

Who am I?
A step when you stop
A torch when you are lost
A word when you are quiet
A smile when you are sad
A shoulder when you cry
Far from you but always around you

Tute Khwabo Ki Tasvir

tute khwabo ki tasvir kab puri hoti hai
chand taro ke beech mein bhi duri hoti hai
dena to khuda bhi sab kuchh chahta hai
par uski bhi kuchh majburi hoti hai

Saturday, September 18, 2010

If Fate Favours

If fate favours you one day and you are asked what you want to be, don't wish to be some one else because you are wonderful the way you are.

Morning Is A Wonderful

Morning is a
to wish
to love
to care
to smile
And to see you in good mood

Good Morning... Have a lovely day!

I'll Say No Way

You say "RUN" I say "HOW FAR"
You say "SWIM" I say "HOW DEEP"
You say "JUMP" I say "HOW HIGH"
But if you say "GO AWAY" i'll say "NO WAY"

That's my friendship

Titanic Doob Raha Tha

TITANIC doob raha tha, kisi ne puchcha, "Zameen yaha se kitni dur hai?"
Koi Bola: 3km
Aadmi ne pani mein jump laga ke puchcha "Kis taraf?"
Woh Bola: niche ki taraf

Everything Happens For

Everything happens for a purpose. Our friendship wasn't an accident my destiny wanted me to get the best but unfortunately you got the best. Anyways never mind.....

Zaruraton Ke Mutabik

Zaruraton ke mutabik zindagi jiyo khwahishon ke mutabik nahi kyunki zarurat fakeer ki bhi puri hoti hai aur khwahish badshahon ki bhi adhuri reh jati hai.

Ego Is Just Like

"Ego is just like dust in the eye. Without clearing the dust you can't see anything clearly." So clear the ego and see the world.

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

A Beautiful Romantic Thought

"He saw my face but forgot to look into my heart, I looked into his heart so I couldn't forget his face."

Time Moves Fast

Time moves fast when we are holding the hands of our loved ones but time moves hard and kill us every second when we miss our loved ones.

Aap Kya Nikle?

Mujhe aap se ye ummeed nahi thi, maine apko kya samjha aur aap kya nikle? Maine apko ek achcha dost samjha tha lekin aap to ???





Uss se bhi achche nikle.

Duniya Mein Jab Bhi

Duniya mein jab bhi apki jeet hogi to hum garv se kahenge, "That's my friend" aur agar kabhi aap hare to apka hath pakad ke kahenge, "I am your friend".

Nice Lines On Life

The tree does not withdraw it's shade even from the woodcutter. So, love even those who hurt you they will realise your worth someday.

Life Starts With

Life starts with a voice but ends with silence. Love starts with a fear but ends with tears. True friendship starts any where and ends no where.

Ab It's Not Possible

Father: ek zamana tha ki main Rs10 mein kirana, saag, doodh aur nashta leke aata tha
Beta: ab possible nahi hai Dad, kyunki ab waha CCTV Camera hota hai

Monday, September 13, 2010

Sapna Kabhi Saakaar Nahi

sapna kabhi saakaar nahi hota
mohabbat ka koi aakaar nahi hota
sab kuch ho jata hai is duniya mein
magar dobara kisi se sacha pyaar nahi hota

Have A Good Night

G = go to bed
O = off the light
O = out of tension
D = dreams come true
N = nice sleep
I = ignore worry
G = get fresh
H = have a sweet dream
T = thank God

Kuchh Log Achchi

Kuchh log achchi yaadon ki tarah hote hain jinhe yaad kar ke dil khush ho jata hai aur jinko bhulana namumkin hai

aap unhi mein se


ka msg padh rahe ho...

what did you think?

Who Is Mother?

M = motivator
O = only one
T = true love
H = heartiest
E = exceptional
R = responsible

Always respect your MOTHER.

It's Not The Presence

It's not the presence of some one that brings meaning to life but the way some one touches your heart gives life a beautiful meaning.

Height Of Insult

Maths Teacher: jab main tumhare jitna tha, mujhe maths mein 100 marks milte the
Student: sir, aap ko koi achcha teacher padhata hoga

Har Roz Roshni

har roz roshni ke hazaar sitare nikle
aur aap ki aankhon mein haseen nazaare nikle
jail mein hum bhi gaye apke sath
jab apke chori ke mobile mein sab se zyada SMS hamare nikle

Friday, September 10, 2010

An Old Farmer Wrote

An old farmer wrote to his innocent son in prison -
This year I wont be able to plant potatoes because I don't have strength to dig the ground. I know if you were here you'll help me.

The son replied -
Don't dig it that's where I buried the guns.

The police read the letter and the next day the ground was dug by police looking for guns but nothing was found.

The son wrote again -
Now plant your potatoes dad, it's the best I could do from here.


To Be Successful

To be successful in life follow 3 things -
1. Put Ice Factory in your brain to be Cool
2. Put Steel Factory in your Heart to be strong
3. Put Sugar Factory in your tongue to be Sweet

Just See The

Just see the sky, all stars are blinking except one cute star that is busy reading my SMS...Good Night

What's Your Father's Occupation

Teacher: what is your father's occupation?
Student: I.C.S in summer and P.C.S in winter
Teacher: what's that?
Student: Ice Cream Seller in summer and Pakoda Chat Seller in winter

Don't Show Attitude

"AALU" Bhindi se pyaar karta tha. Usne bhindi ko propose kiya to bhindi attitude se boli, "Tu to MOTA hai, mujhe nahi pasand". Ab dekho Aalu ki kitni girlfriends hain -
par Bhindi ki koi saheli ya dost nahi

MORAL: Wo akela reh jata hai jo attitude dikhata hai. So don't show attitude.

Koi Rulata Hai

koi rulata hai
koi hansata hai
dosti to har kisi se hai
kisi na kisi se fark itna hai
ki koi aajmata hai
aur koi nibhata hai

What is "DUA"?

"D" - DIL se nikli hui awaz jo apko din bhar sachi de
"U" - UDAASI aap ke kareeb se bhi na guzre
"A" - AAP hamesha khush rahe

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

Zindagi Mein Do Minute Koi

Zindagi mein 2 minute koi mere paas na baitha, aaj sab mere paas baithe ja rahe the
Koi phool na mila aj tak mujhe, aaj phool he phool aur bouquet diye ja rahe the
Taras gaya naye kapde ko, aaj naye naye kapde udhaye ja rahe the
Do kadam sath na chalne ko tyaar tha koi, aaj sab kafila banakar mere sath ja rahe the
Aaj pata chala ki maut kitni haseen hoti hai, hum to yun hi jiye ja rahe the

Moral - Zinda logo ki kadar karna seekho

Itni Fariyaad Hai

itni fariyaad hai ki humein yaad rakhna
hamare saath beete pal yaad rakhna
hum bhi yaad karte hai apko itna khayal rakhna
chahe humein apne dil mein sab ke baad rakhna

Kya Aapki Do Biwiyan Hai?

Ek Aadmi ki ek tang ki haddi toot gayi, hospital gaya to waha kisi aadmi ki dono tange tooti dekh kar bola, "Kya aapki 2 biwiyan hai?"

Us Lamhe Ko Bura

Us lamhe ko bura mat kaho jo tumhein thokar pahunchata hai
Us lamhe ki kadar karo kyunki wo tumhein jeene ka andaaz sikhata hai

Apne Aansuon Ko

Apne aansuon ko itna mehnga karo ki koi unhe lene ki koshish na kare
Apni muskan ko itna sasta kar do ki har koi usko pane ki chah kare

Never Hate People

Never hate people who are jealous of you, instead love them because they are the ones who think you are better than them.

Zindagi Mein Kamyaabi

Zindagi mein kamyaabi ki MANZIL ke liye KHWAAB dekhna zaruri hai aur KHWAAB dekhne ke liye NEEND.
To apni MANZIL ki pehli sidi chadho
So Jao

Tuesday, September 7, 2010

Woh Kaun Hai?

Teacher: who kaun hai jo aasman mein udti hai par bachche zameen pe deti hai?
Santa kuch dair sochne ke baad: Air Hostess

Dil Ke Dard Ko

dil ke dard ko dil todne wale kya jane
pyar ki rasmo ko ye zamane wale kya jane
hoti hogi kitni takleef kabar ke niche
ye upar se phool chadhane wale kya jane

Husband Office Jaa Raha Tha

Husband office jaa raha tha. Patni pyaar se boli, "See you in the evening". Husband gusse se bola, "Dhamki kise de rahi hai? Main bhi tujhe dekh loonga".

How Can You Trust

How can you trust on the words -

beLIEve when there is a lie in center
friEND when there is an end at the end of every friend
lOVER when there ia a over in every lover

Think Think!!!

Log Puchte Hai

Log puchte hai tum kyun apni mohabbat ka izhaar nahi karte?
Humne kaha -
jo lafzo mein bayaan ho jaye sirf utna hum kisi se pyar nahi karte

Definition of HUG

When you love the soul of some one too much and you can't describe your feelings by any communication and want to give a loving touch to that one whom you love is a HUG.

Monday, September 6, 2010

People Who Meet You

People who meet you in the journey of life expect a lot from you but there are some idiots who expect nothing more than just you !!! They are your best buddies.

The Real Art

The real art of conversation is not only to say the right thing at the right place but to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the most tempting moment.

Kagaz Ki Kashti Thi

kagaz ki kashti thi pani ka kinara tha
khelne ki masti thi dil ye awara tha
kahan aa gaye is duniyadari ke dal-dal mein
wo nadan bachpan he kitna pyara tha

A Beautiful Life Does

A beautiful life does not just happen, it is built daily in Prayer, in Humanity, in Sacrifice, in Love. May a beautiful life be yours always.

A Cute Letter

A cute letter be a little kid who hates maths:

Dear Maths,
Please grow up soon and try to solve your own problem don't depend on others.

A Couple Had Fight

A couple had fight one night. When they were going to bed -
Husband taunted: good night, mother of 3 kids
Wife replied: good night, father of none

Aankhe Bhi Meri

aankhe bhi meri palkon se sawal karti hai
har waqt aapko he yaad karti hai
jab tak na dekh le message aapka
tab tak wo aapke msg ka intezar karti hai

Sunday, September 5, 2010

Jin Ka Bachcha Kaisa Hota Hai?

Ek mele mein announced hua: ek bachcha mila hai, JIN ka hai aa kar le jaaiye
Ek aadmi aayaa aur bola: mujhe bhi dikhaao, JIN ka bachcha kaisa hota hai

Dusra Bachcha Do

Ek aadmi ke ghar beta hua. Aadmi ne use goud mein liya, to bachche ne susu kar diya.
Aadmi nurse se: dusra do ye LEAK ho raha hai

Kisi Ko Aitraaz To Nahi?

Feron ke waqt Pandit ne mehmano se pucha: kisi ko is shaadi se aitraaz to nahi?
Ek aadmi bola: mujhe hai
Pandit: tum chup raho tum DULHE ho

A True Quote

A very true but strange quote - "Love doesn't start in morning and doesn't end in evening. It starts when you don't need it and ends when you need it the most."

Smaller Thing Upset

Smaller things upset more in life than bigger ones. You can be on top of a mountain but you can't be on top a needle. Ouch!!!

If You Miss

If you miss anything in life don't fill your eyes with tears it may hide yet another beautiful thing standing in front of you.

Hum Laakh Achche

hum laakh achche hain par log kharab kehte hain
wo bigda hua humko nawaab kehte hain
hum to aise badnaam ho gaye
ki pani bhi piye to log sharab kehte hain

Saturday, September 4, 2010

It Starts With

It starts with 'hi' changes to 'wass up' grows to 'oye pagal' tends to 'tu apna dimag mat chala' falls to 'thappad khana hai' and finally 'tu sambhal lena yaar' thats friendship.

A Girl Is Always

A girl is always RIGHT...

just sometimes
& even

but not


Saying Good Morning

Saying good morning is not just starting a new day. It's a way of saying, 'I remember you before I start my day'. Have a nice day!!!

Love For Coin

A kanjus boy fell in love with a kanjus girl.
Girl: jab dad so jayenge to main gali mein sikka phenk dungi to tum jaldi se andar aa jana
lekin ladka sikka phenkne ke ek ghante baad aaya
Girl: itni dair kyun laga di
Boy: main sikka dhoond raha tha
Girl: pagal, wo to maine dhaga baandh ke phenka tha

An Interesting Conversation

Read this I am sure you just can't expect the climax -

Mom: wake up son, it's time to go to college
Son: why mom? I don't want to go to college
Mom: give me two reasons why you don't want to go to college?
Son: One, all the students hate me. Two, all the teachers hate me.
Mom: oh! that's not a reason. Come on, you have to go to college
Son: give me two reasons why I should go to college?
Mom: One, you are 55 yrs old. Two, you are the Principal of the college!

Thursday, September 2, 2010

Zindagi Ki Keemat

Zindagi ki keemat ka andaza maut ke baad he hota hai
For example
Zinda murgi
Rs 100/-
Chicken Tandoori
Rs 480/-

Heart Touching Sms

A little boy lost his parents in tsunami. One day he said standing on the sea shore, "Sea, no matter how many times your waves touch my feet i'll not forgive you".

A Thoughtful Quote

"You can hurt a heart only till it loves you not after it starts hating you."

Yaaro Mujhe Abhi

yaaro mujhe abhi mat dafnao
mere dost ko dair se aane ki aadat hai
mere upar kafan abhi mat dalo
unhe mera chehra dekh kar muskurane ki aadat hai

An Emotional Quote

Nice line said by a broken heart -
"Please don't come one more time in front of me, otherwise once again i'll trust you."